Sanctuary
by nibun
Summary: Updated 1/5/02 with part 2! Duo and Heero find a sanctuary in one another in the midst of their dark lives. Yaoi, AU, 1x2x1
1. Part 1

Author: nibun (nibun@pacbell.net)  
  
Disclaimer: You know the drill, I don't own em. *sniff* I may not own the characters or the GW Universe, but I do own this story I wrote! Please don't steal from me!  
  
Warnings: Shounen-ai / Yaoi, sap, angst, AU  
  
Rating: Um, PG?  
  
Pairings: 1x2x1  
  
  
  
Sanctuary ~ Part 1  
  
Created: 12/22/01 Completed: 12/22/01  
  
Duo Maxwell walked tiredly along the seemingly never-ending stretch of sidewalk, a yawn widening his slackened face. A backpack full of books pulled down heavily on his shoulders, causing him to hunch slightly forward. His steps were measured, even, carrying him ever-nearer to another day at school, another day of self-imposed torture that he couldn't quite help. And a torture that was otherwise inflicted....  
  
Soon the front gates came into view and he sighed in disappointment, some part of him perhaps believing that he would walk on forever. A weight greater than that upon his shoulders settled upon his heart, and he blinked away the faint stinging in his eyes before it could become any stronger. There was no time for crying, no time to make himself appear even more vulnerable than he already was. But life, seemed so empty, so dreary and torturous, that he couldn't figure out what else he was supposed to do.  
  
He wondered what the purpose was in his living if he had nothing for which to live. Every day was lifeless, something limp and dead that he had neither the strength nor the means to bring to life. Always surrounded by the darkness or the fear of the darkness to come. Of what worth was a life full of desperation and fear and nothing else? No comfort greeted him, never did he feel the warmth of family or friends, the security of knowing that if it were only one person, at least someone in this world truly loved him.  
  
Steeling himself for another day, Duo walked through the front gates into the all-boys private school, an ever-present mask of indifference set upon his face. His expression remained unchanged even as his insides churned at each stare of disgust or contempt, each face turned away in a refusal of acknowledgement, some shamed and some not. The awkwardness that found him each day overtook him, and he found himself conscious of the sway of his arms beside him, the rhythm of his breathing, how often he blinked. He walked faster without seeming as if he were trying to do so, feeling the eyes all over him as if they were crawling inside of his skin and his mind and could hear every thought that resided there.  
  
The door to his first class came into sight and he sighed in relief once he passed through, quickly taking his seat. His moment of respite was just that, but a moment, and he wouldn't truly feel secure until class had begun. He counted the seconds as they ticked slowly by, grateful as the bell finally rang. All eyes moved from him to the teacher at the front of the room, and he sagged gratefully into his chair. His life changed in the very next moment.  
  
Duo felt his eyes drawn to the closed door before it even opened. He watched seemingly in slow motion as the knob turned, the large slab of wood pushing inward from the hallway. Slender fingers were wrapped around the handle on the other side, followed by a tanned arm partly revealed by the short sleeves of the school uniform. And then....  
  
Duo's mouth hung slightly open as the other boy came into full view. He could feel his blood thrumming through his veins as he could never remember, the expression on his face and in his heart, amazed. His senses were heightened, sight, hearing, taste touch smell, and nothing existed but him and this boy, this otherworldly being.  
  
A compact frame, small but toned, slightly muscular, betraying the strength held within. He moved with a grace that seemed unnatural in its fluidity. And his hair, was dark and wild and untamed, bangs falling restlessly into his eyes. Oh, but his eyes. Such a deep, endless blue, the kind that drew a person in and hypnotized them into staying forever. Somehow they spoke to him, even before they had met his own. They spoke of asylum, refuge, relief.  
  
Sanctuary.  
  
A sight for sore eyes, an oasis in the desert, and the most beautiful person Duo had ever seen. Those eyes flew directly to his own as if drawn somehow, and he felt himself drown.  
  
  
  
Heero Yuy stood outside the classroom door. It was his first day at this new school, and he was uncertain of what to expect. He had transferred himself here because of this insane girl that had refused to leave him alone; he figured that an all-boys school would be one of the best solutions to his problem.  
  
Under any other circumstances he would be glad for the attention, but Relena was crazy. His own parents ignored him and he pretty much controlled his own existence. However, he had no friends to depend on or to laugh with, and no one would ever approach him because of his brooding demeanor. It was only recently that he had actually admitted to being lonely, if only to himself. Love, of any kind, was something he could hardly even fathom, yet something he dreamed of at the same time. He lived in a world of isolation, yearning for someone, for something that seemed beyond his reach; however, the very same concept of love scared him. The thought of holding a person's happiness in his hands was thrilling yet terrifying. But still, in a life so empty and lifeless as his own, he couldn't help the want, the thirst for human contact that filled him at any given moment in time. Sometimes it seemed as if his body hummed with it, the intrinsic need to love and be loved in return.  
  
Hearing the final bell ring, he took a deep breath and prepared to enter the classroom. As soon as his hand pushed open the door a tingling sensation washed over his body, and he could feel a pair of eyes burning into him. He swallowed but remained face-forward until he reached the center of the room, where the teacher was waiting for him. Finally he stopped and turned, eyes drawn immediately to another.  
  
Suddenly all he could see was shining chestnut and glowing violet, encompassing his vision like an early morning fog. Long, impossibly long hair, like twined chestnut silk creeping down the boy's side. A face that was somehow strong and soft at the same moment, bangs falling boyishly into his eyes. Oh, but his eyes. Bright and deep and intense and burning into his own like violet flames, lighting something inside him afire. He saw everything he'd ever wanted in those eyes: asylum, refuge, relief.  
  
Sanctuary.  
  
A breath of fresh air, a light in the dark, and the most beautiful person he had ever seen. After feeling a slight push on his back he walked forward as if in a trance, seating himself in an empty desk next to the other boy, not hearing or seeing or knowing anything but him. He swallowed heavily after several seconds, and held out his hand without even realizing his own action.  
  
"Heero Yuy," he said, his voice even.  
  
Duo returned the gesture and they gripped each other's hands, electricity shooting up both their arms. Duo replied, in a voice that belied his lack of composure.  
  
"Duo Maxwell, nice to meet you."  
  
Their hands separated and Heero nodded in return, both pairs of eyes reluctantly moving to the teacher in the front of the room. Heero had a feeling he had just made the best friend one could ever have in life.  
  
Duo felt the same.  
  
  
  
~Tsuzuku~ 


	2. Part 2

Author: nibun (nibun@pacbell.net)  
  
Disclaimer: You know the drill, I don't own em. *sniff* I may not own the characters or the GW Universe, but I do own this story I wrote! Please don't steal from me!  
  
Warnings: Shounen-ai / Yaoi, angst, sap, language, AU  
  
Rating: PG-13 for language  
  
Pairings: 1x2x1  
  
Sanctuary ~ Part 2  
  
Created: 1/1/02 Completed: 1/5/02  
  
Both boys could feel a nervous energy fluttering about inside of them as the teacher was wrapping up the lesson at the front of the room. Neither had been able to focus on what was being taught, as each had been busy thinking of the boy sitting next to him the whole period. Both were filled with a persistent curiosity about the other, wondering why they were so drawn to each other, and if anything would come of the anticipation and sense of relief they had felt at seeing one another for the first time.  
  
The class came to an end, and Duo and Heero exchanged nervous glances as they gathered their belongings. Once outside in the hallways they fell into step, side-by-side. But now that they finally had the chance to speak, a blanket of silence had fallen over them. After several seconds, Duo finally cleared his throat, his voice hesitant.  
  
"So... um, where do you come from?" He turned his head to watch the other boy as he waited for him to reply, hardly believing that they were actually talking. He couldn't help but grasp at the hope that Heero would be the hand to pull him out, away from the crashing waves of the ocean of darkness his life seemed destined to remain.  
  
Heero seemed a bit uncertain as he replied, the newness of their acquaintance weighing down upon his voice. "Actually, I didn't move here, I switched from a different school. I used to go to Clearwater, [1] but there was a girl there who would follow me everywhere I went. I decided to switch myself to an all-boys school to try to get her to leave me alone. But I wouldn't be surprised if she managed to disguise herself as a boy just to follow me *here* as well," he said, a hint of exasperation in his voice.  
  
Duo eyed him with a mixture of sympathy and amusement, his heart meanwhile beating giddily in his chest. His attention for once was focused on something besides the other students, and the looks that he dreaded each day went by unnoticed.  
  
"You said you switched yourself, what do you mean? What about your parents?" Duo looked at Heero curiously, wanting to ask so many questions now that he finally had someone to answer them.  
  
Heero's breath escaped his nostrils in a derisive puff, his body tensing and his demeanor becoming closed off. "My parents don't participate in anything I do, and I wouldn't allow them to if they tried. I try to avoid them when I can, and they ignore me in return. I'm content to take care of myself."  
  
Duo looked at him in a sort of confused, helpless curiosity, then looked away. A quiet, ironic laugh left his lips.  
  
"I wish I were so lucky," he murmured under his breath, not intending for his words to carry to Heero's ears.  
  
Heero glanced at him in surprised confusion. "Why? Why would you want to be invisible to your own family?" His voice held soft, feathery notes of pain.  
  
Duo started, then bit his lip, turning away. He spoke softly. "There... there're worse things, than being ignored by your family."  
  
Heero frowned, opening his mouth, but someone spoke to them before he could comment any further.  
  
"Hey you."  
  
The two boys looked up, Duo's expression immediately turning dark and bitter as he saw the malice in the other student's eyes. Heero, unaware of Duo's predicament, looked at the ebony-haired boy questioningly.  
  
"Yeah, you. I'd stay away from him if I were you, he's bad for your health."  
  
Duo looked away from the boy and Heero's worried glance, chewing on his lip as another guy came up behind the first, a smirk on his face.  
  
"Yep, unless *you* want die too. Or turn queer like this cock-sucker here." He laughed. "Yeah, he'll make you into a fag and *then* kill you." His eyes became serious, then slanted over to meet Duo's burning glare. "Just like you did to Solo, na?" His gaze turned to one of disgust and contempt as the two boys turned to leave. "Fucker."  
  
Duo shied away from Heero's severely bewildered face, shutting his eyes tightly and leaning his forehead against the wall. God, he could feel himself shaking. He jumped but didn't look up as he felt Heero's hand rest hesitantly upon his shoulder.  
  
"Duo," Heero's voice came out slowly, "what the hell were they talking about?" Looking around briefly, he saw for the first time all the glares that were aimed in their direction, and the cold shoulders that were given by everyone else. He turned his attention back to Duo, speaking vehemently. "What's going on?"  
  
The long-haired boy remained silent, his body beginning to tremble even more violently. He shook his head, breathing heavily. He tried desperately not to cry, even as he felt tears begin to sting at his eyes. `Godammit, I will NOT cry, I will not cry....' Neither of them heard the bell ring in the background, or noticed as the halls cleared out.  
  
Heero looked on in nervous concern, Duo's mannerisms filling him with a skittish fear. Trying to keep from feeling helpless, he softened his voice, licking dry lips.  
  
"Duo, I'm not mad at you, or afraid of you. I promise. I just want to know what's going on." Heero frowned worriedly. "Here, we can talk about it later, okay? Just calm down. Please, Duo...." His voice grew a tad desperate, unable to take the pain he felt at seeing Duo so unstable, so... vulnerable and scared. He hesitated, feeling awkward as he was unused to touching others or being touched himself. He made up his mind and rested his other hand lightly upon Duo's back, flinching as Duo flinched. His hand began moving in gentle, calming circles, and he swallowed to moisten his throat, which was dry with the unfamiliarity of the situation. He leaned forward hesitantly, bringing his head closer to Duo's, his breath washing uncertainly over the side of his face.  
  
"It's... it's okay."  
  
Duo began to calm down, and Heero's pulse began to slow as a result. A violet eye peeked precariously to the side, unsure. Heero gave a tiny, wavering smile, which Duo eventually reciprocated as he turned slowly to face the other boy. Speaking, however, was not quite as easy a task.  
  
"I...." Duo felt his throat tighten up, and he bit down hard on his lip to keep the tears at bay. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "I... I'll tell you at lunch. You should probably know what's going on, since it affects my everyday life."  
  
Both boys paused to consider those words, marveling and wondering just how their everyday lives had come to concern the other in only about an hour of even knowing one another.  
  
Heero nodded slowly. "Where should I meet you?"  
  
Duo ran the shaky fingers of one hand restlessly through his bangs. "Um, for now just meet me at my fourth period class, 4-A, and we'll go from there. Na?"  
  
Heero nodded once again, and his eyes grew soft. Duo swore he could feel the Japanese boy's gaze reach out to stroke his cheek. He smiled tentatively, almost able to completely forget what had just happened.  
  
"Well, I guess I'll see you later then."  
  
"Yeah, I'll see ya."  
  
Their eyes locked and Duo brought forth every drop of gratitude and affection he felt warming his insides. They walked off in opposite directions, eyes drawn together until they disappeared around the corners.  
  
~Tsuzuku~  
  
[1] Heh, we were in the car when I started writing this part, and my brother was playing a Creedence Clearwater CD, hence the name of Heero's previous school. ^_~ 


	3. Part 3

Author: nibun (nibun@pacbell.net)  
  
Disclaimer: You know the drill, I don't own em. *sniff* I may not own the characters or the GW Universe, but I do own this story I wrote! Please don't steal from me!  
  
Warnings: Shounen-ai / Yaoi, angst, some sap, language, AU  
  
Rating: PG-13 for language  
  
Pairings: 1x2x1  
  
Sanctuary ~ Part 3  
  
Created: 1/5/02 Completed: 2/6/02  
  
Duo twisted his hands together anxiously, sitting on one of the desks in the now vacant room. He could feel his heart keeping a quick pace in his chest, making him feel uncomfortably jumpy. He couldn't imagine how he'd be able to tell Heero the story of Solo. The night he died had seemed like a nightmare, one that would start over every time he remembered. Duo buried his face in his hands in remorse. It was the kind of ridiculous thing you saw in a movie or read in a book, it wasn't supposed to happen in real life....  
  
Duo jumped as a hesitant hand landed itself on his shoulder. Looking up with a shackled fear, he breathed a sigh of relief as he saw that it was Heero. Swallowing heavily, he gave a small, tentative smile, sliding off of the desk. They remained in a contemplative silence as Duo led them outside to the field, continuing until they reached the edge of the grass. There was a small cove of trees, providing shade and a sense of seclusion that Duo reveled in during the torturous hours spent at school. [1] He sat down nervously, leaning against a trunk as he waited for Heero to follow suit. Those eyes fixed worriedly on his own and he could feel himself trembling at the thought of the task before him. He turned his gaze to his own lap, unable to hold the connection with those probing eyes.  
  
Duo sat with his hands in his lap and lip between his teeth, fiddling nervously with his fingers, his pants, the sleeves of his shirt. And after a few long, frozen seconds, Heero's hands came slowly into view. They paused uncertainly before him, as if afraid their touch would be shunned and unwelcome. At a small twitch of Duo's finger, they tentatively moved forward once more, enfolding Duo's hands in a cocoon of inexperienced yet eager warmth and reassurance. The feelings were foreign to both boys, one even less acquainted with displays of affection than the other.  
  
Duo felt his breath hitch, seeing how the shades of their hands, while different, seemed to match each other perfectly. He could feel the very want of understanding emanating from Heero's skin, healing seeping from those calloused fingertips to be absorbed by his own flesh. A devastating sense of belonging struck him like a freshly-sharpened blade, unwinding his muscles, calming his nervousness. An unfamiliar brand of tears rose to his eyes, and although he tried to hold it back, a sob escaped his aching throat. His head turned beseechingly to Heero's shoulder, his grip of Heero's hands tightening impossibly. He cried.  
  
Heero's arms went around him, causing the shaking boy to cry that much harder. Never in his life had he been surrounded by such a strong feeling of warmth and understanding, never had he been able to cry to anyone besides himself and the cold isolation that seemed to follow him everywhere he went, everywhere he existed. He grasped desperately at the shoulders of Heero's shirt, his tears wetting the soft fabric. He felt Heero rocking them, awkwardly at first, then soothingly. He could feel his warm breath against his face as he whispered quietly, unintelligible murmurs uttered for his benefit. He buried his wet face in Heero's neck, whispered words of gratitude that even he couldn't understand, and held tightly to Heero's body, as if the slightest loosening of his grasp would make him disappear.  
  
Heero, meanwhile, didn't know where his own actions were coming from. Each move was an instinct, each whisper a gut feeling. It seemed as if he had suddenly become sure of himself, knowing exactly what needed to be done. As if he had been shown such care in his own life, and could pass it on to Duo, even as he knew that wasn't the case. He was baffled.  
  
After several minutes had passed, Duo's sobs died down to small, sniffling hiccups. He cautiously raised his head from Heero's chest, looking up precariously. He was greeted with a tender smile, and with the tug of arms that turned him around and pulled his back against a warm, comfortable chest. Heero's hands laced with his own across his stomach, and his chin rested lightly upon his shoulder. Duo's breath caught and he leaned back, smiling waveringly, such a feeling of warmth filling him that he believed he would become drowsy and fall asleep right there in Heero's arms.  
  
After a short pause, a hesitant whisper fell gently upon Duo's ear. "Talk to me." Hands tightened slowly against his stomach. "Onegai... let me into you. Let yourself out."  
  
Duo shuddered involuntarily at the other boy's words and pressed firmly back, his eyes seeming to haze over as if he were becoming lost in some other world. His voice began as a whisper, eventually strengthening into a quiet stream of halted speech.  
  
"S... Solo, was, one of the most popular boys at school. He was great at sports, always got good grades, always at the center of attention. Everyone loved him. Me, I was always a loner. And when I came to this school, that didn't change, but... but I could feel his eyes on me, feel him watching me. He found me one day after school, said he wanted to hang out, and... and, he kissed me. The most popular boy in school, kissed me, said he wanted to be with me, when... when no one else in my life, had ever cared so much as to give me a second glance."  
  
Duo's breath hitched, his brow furrowing. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, trying to compose himself. Warm breath touched his face, a soft cheek barely brushing against his own. Mustering his emotional strength, he continued.  
  
"But, it had to be a secret, no one could know, or else he would be an outcast. I didn't want that for him, so I went along with it. I was so afraid to lose him, I would've done anything....  
  
"But one day, I... I guess someone saw us at the park, had seen us... us, kissing, and, the next day...." Duo bit his lip, trying desperately to swallow the lump that had arisen in his throat. He felt himself being drawn in tighter by Heero's arms, protecting him from completely losing his sanity. His voice burst from his chest, his body flinching against Heero's firm hold.  
  
"We tried! We tried so hard to be careful, we went where we thought no one could find us, where no one would see, but, someone, I don't know who, but they saw. They saw us. I don't know.... And, and the next day, people weren't ignoring me anymore. It was like today, like every day, but so much worse, so very much worse.... They were glaring, whispering, calling me names, horrible, horrible names. They would hit me, attack me in groups so that there was nothing I could do, nowhere for me to run or hide. The teachers wouldn't do anything, they didn't care, didn't give a damn about a poor little faggot with no one to turn to! They didn't give a fuck about me!!!"  
  
Duo struggled within Heero's grasp, his voice vicious and tears streaming from his burning eyes. Heero held tight, his breathing heavy, his body on fire.  
  
"They `excused' Solo, each person with his own explanation. They thought he was stringing me along, or that I had tricked him into it somehow, or that it was an entire fucking lie in the first place."  
  
Duo's voice sobered, his struggling ceased completely as he lay limp against Heero's chest.  
  
"They would leave me alone when he was around, he would make them. They didn't get it, but the damn conformist bastards went along with it anyway. We couldn't see each other anymore, either. They were always around, always watching, somehow, and I could never be near him, never hear him tell me that it would all be okay. It hurt so much. They took away the only good thing in my life, and it hurt so much...."  
  
Duo sobbed, turning to his side and curling desperately into Heero's chest, pushing against him as if he could somehow climb inside. His eyes were glassy as he stared desolately forward.  
  
"And then, one night..."  
  
~Tsuzuku~  
  
[1] Heh, I seem to like giving them some sort of tree cover for them to hide away in, don't I (referring to HotI as well). *sweatdrop* 


End file.
